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Slipping, Struggling, and Still Becoming

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When I first began facing the wounds I had carried for years, I thought healing would feel smooth; a steady climb upward until I reached freedom. What I’ve learned instead is that healing often feels like stumbling through uneven ground: progress one day, setbacks the next. Some days I’ve felt whole and strong, other days I’ve felt fragile, raw, and even slipped back into old ways of thinking and being. For a while, I saw this as failure. But slowly, God began teaching me: healing is rarely neat, but it is always holy. The Messy Middle It can be disorienting when one moment you’re worshiping with joy, and the next, you’re undone by a memory you thought you’d outgrown or slipping into depression from the frustration of the journey and the weight of what I'm processing and learning. The messiness doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means your heart is being retrained. Healing asks us to face layer after layer, and that rarely happens in a straight line. What steadies me in the messy mi...
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You’re Not Broken, You’re Becoming: God’s Patient Work in Our Fragile Places

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  I used to think healing would look like a single breakthrough moment — a day I’d wake up and the pain would be gone, the memories dulled, the triggers erased. Instead, what I’ve found is that healing often feels slow, fragile, and messy. Some days, it feels like progress: I notice I don’t react as strongly to words that once pierced me. Other days, an unexpected smell or tone of voice can yank me back into memories I thought I’d left behind. At first, I thought this meant I was failing — that I wasn’t strong enough, or spiritual enough, or “over it” enough. But over time, God has been showing me something different: healing isn’t about erasing; it’s about becoming. The Layers We Peel Back Healing doesn’t usually come all at once. It comes in layers. God, in His kindness, reveals what we’re ready to face, touches that part with His love, and then, when it’s time, says, “Let’s go deeper.” That can feel discouraging — like we’re stuck in cycles of pain. But every layer healed...
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When Healing Feels Hard: How Faith, Vulnerability, and Community Work Together

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  Healing rarely happens all at once. For many, it unfolds like layers; each one requiring a new kind of courage, a deeper kind of trust. And at the heart of this journey is something most people don’t talk enough about: vulnerability . The Silent Struggle with Vulnerability Many people carry silent fears around being truly seen. Whether it's because of past betrayals, rejection, or childhood conditioning, letting others witness our pain can feel dangerous. Some become hyper-independent, others keep conversations on the surface, some master the art of helping everyone else while keeping their own hearts guarded. The irony? What feels like protection often becomes a prison. Healing requires honesty, and not just with God, but with ourselves and with others. Vulnerability isn’t weakness. It’s the doorway to healing . Trusting God in the Middle of the Mess Sometimes, when we’re hurting, we unconsciously try to earn our way back into God’s presence by performing, praying perfectl...
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Learning to Heal: The Quiet Work God Is Still Doing in Me

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  Learning to Heal: The Quiet Work God Is Still Doing in Me Reflections by K.SUWA There’s something I wish more people would say out loud: healing is not always linear. It’s not always visible. It doesn’t always feel like progress. Some days, I feel strong like the version of me I prayed to become is finally taking shape. But other days, I feel raw. Tired. Fragile. And not because I’ve stopped growing, but because growth has layers. Some of them take longer to reach. This season has brought that truth home in new ways. I've had to face the quiet patterns I once called strength like not asking for help, staying busy so I wouldn’t have to feel, or managing my emotions alone. For years, I lived in survival mode without even knowing it. Hyper-independence, emotional detachment, people-pleasing… all were protective walls I built without realizing I’d locked myself inside them. But survival isn’t the same as healing. And self-sufficiency isn’t the same as wholeness. Slowly, I’ve ...
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Reflections on Healing: Lessons I’m Still Learning

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  Title: Reflections on Healing: Lessons I’m Still Learning Author’s Note: This post weaves together thoughts from my recent reflections on healing and inner growth. If you’re on your own healing journey, I hope you find a bit of yourself in these words. There are days when I feel like I’m making progress, when I set boundaries with clarity and confidence, when forgiveness feels freeing, and when my strength feels like something solid I can lean on. And then there are days when I crumble. Healing, I’ve come to learn, is not a straight line. It’s not a checklist of milestones or a series of “aha” moments that mean you’re finally okay. Sometimes, healing looks like setting a boundary and then feeling guilty about it. Sometimes it’s forgiving someone who never apologized—again. Other times, it’s simply whispering, “God, I’m tired.” Forgiving Without an Apology This has been one of the hardest lessons to learn. I used to think healing required closure. But the truth is, we don’...
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Healing Beyond the Hurt: Choosing Wholeness Even Without an Apology

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  For many years, I carried invisible wounds, bruises on my soul that no one else could see. Some came from words never retracted, betrayals never acknowledged, and apologies that never came. Like many believers, I thought the Christian thing to do was simply to deal with it and move on, pretending it did not hurt. But the truth is, wounds do not heal just because we ignore them. Lately, God has been teaching me something profound. He cares about the health of our spirit, soul, and body, as 3 John 2 reminds us. Emotional healing is not optional, it is essential to living the full and abundant life He intends for us. Yet emotional wounds are rarely talked about openly in church. We often focus on spiritual practices without addressing the brokenness that quietly shapes our thoughts, decisions, and even our faith. The Pain of Unacknowledged Hurt One of the deepest sources of emotional pain is waiting for an apology that never comes. I know that ache all too well. For a long time,...
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Embracing Healing: Walking in Wholeness and Confidence

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Healing is a journey, not a destination. For many of us, the wounds of the past shape our present in ways we don’t even realize. The experiences we’ve lived through—whether rejection, disappointment, or deep-seated insecurities—can unconsciously dictate our thoughts, decisions, and behaviors. But what happens when we invite God into that space? What shifts when we allow the Holy Spirit to uncover, heal, and restore those hidden wounds? A Personal Awakening to Healing Lately, I’ve been asking God to heal me from emotional wounds from my past and help me live fully and confidently. I realize that I've been held back, limited, and imprisoned by insecurities and feelings of inadequacy stemming from past hurt. Unconsciously, my decisions and behavior have been shaped by this for a very long time. I have been asking the Holy Spirit to show me the root of the behavioral patterns I have identified, and last weekend, He did. I'm grateful that a divine work of healing has begun and that ...
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Location: Abuja, Federal Capital Territory, Nigeria
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